Easily Puzzled

I am easily puzzled. 

People who wear these are confused enough.
Photo: 123rf.com 

I wonder why sock sizes are different than shoe sizes.  If you are a shoe size 4-10 why do you have to buy socks that are size 9-11?  It seems that every package of socks 9-11 also carries the legend “fits shoe sizes 4-10,” so why can’t they just use the shoe size to begin with?  I think the people who created sock sizes must be the same people who made up women’s underwear sizes. 

Do not disturb.
Photo: comicbookmovie.com

I speculate on why the law states that “no one may annoy a lizard in a city park in Fresno.” I am curious as to why anyone would want to annoy lizards (or how, exactly, lizards become annoyed,) creating the need for this law. More understandable to me is the Eureka law: “Persons may not sleep on a road.”  Although I wonder why anyone would nap in the road, I am quite sure that not napping in the road is a pretty good idea.

Surprisingly easy to find pictures of people sleeping on a road.
Photo: sydney.concreteplayground.com.au 

I do not understand why obvious warning labels are necessary, even in our litigious society.  Do we really need to know that we should  “not take (Zantac) if allergic to Zantac?” How would we know we were allergic to Zantac unless we had already taken the Zantac? Doesn’t that make the warning label obsolete? Would people really try to stop a Swedish Chainsaw with their “hands or genitals?” The shortcomings in people who need labels like this seem more a systemic problem, possibly originating from flaws in an individual’s early education or upbringing, or perhaps prolific glue huffing, and one which cannot be solved with mere warning labels.

Warning: your dog should skip his evening cocktail when using this med.
Photo: mazamail.com

Warning: You should skip YOUR evening cocktail if you think this is a good idea.
Photo: mazamail.com

I also wonder about photographs.  Why do some people look better than they do in real life, and why do some people look worse?  Don’t say bone structure.  Some people just don’t look anything like themselves in pictures.  It’s almost like photos reveal another hidden identity or perhaps some underlying alien presence.  Sometimes, two different photos of the same person don’t look remotely similar. How can anyone know what they really look like? Especially since mirrors seem to be a lot like photos. That’s why I look so good at Macy’s and so bad at home. 

There's hope.
Photo: degree360.com

I am not a good gift giver-- I agonize over my choices-- and so I really do marvel at creative gifters.  But I am still at a loss to understand who would need or want a 3100 Swarovski crystal bejeweled Coffee Maker ($4,000) or a bejeweled toilet ($75,000.)  Actually, the toilet seems like a good buy, but I am unsure about how comfortable it would be.

Photo: kaboodle.com

Why do things that hurt for months go away the day before your doctor’s appointment?  And why does that sound your car makes refuse to repeat at the auto repair shop?

I have a metallic taste in my mouth.
Photo: emergiblog.com

Do you have answers for me?  If not, how about sharing puzzles of your own?  At least then I’ll know I’m not alone.

OK, I might want to rethink stupid warning labels after all.
Photo: mazamail.com